snazziest: It was boner at first sight
Flight attendant on the plane to Maui
To the tourist: Excuse me sir, would you like something to drink?
To me: Sup brah, you like one soda or something.
stop being cute if you’re not gonna date me wtf
ghostam: How relationships work: I like your butt. However, I can notice other butts. They can be nice too. But your butt is my favourite butt. It’s the nicest butt. Because it’s mine. And I can touch it.
If you need me.. call me.
I don’t care if I’m sleeping.. If I’m having my own problems or if I’m angry at you.. If you need me and if you need to talk to me I’ll always be there for you. No matter how big or how small your problem is.. I’ll be there.